Monday, July 4, 2016

Monster Monday (July 4th Edition): Apple Pie Elemental

So, the Fourth of July isn't the most enjoyable time in the Linneman household.  I love the holiday, but we've spent quite a bit of time this weekend trying to console a group of canines made largely inconsolable by the barrage of deceptively harmless explosions all around us.  (Seriously, having it fall on a Monday pretty much means that you get four straight nights of fireworks!)

We did manage to have a nice quiet afternoon, though, with a really solid feast of veggie burgers, potato salad, and apple pie, which is probably as quintessentially American as we get around here!

I was reminded of this fearsome beast...

The Apple Pie Elemental

No one is quite sure what magical mistake or act of whimsical wizardry produced the Apple Pie Elemental, but sightings have been reported around the United States for at least a century.  Some observers believe it is literally empowered by American nationalism, some think it bears the wandering soul of John Chapman, and many feel it is an avatar of the land itself, eternally seeking revenge against those who perpetrated evil in the name of manifest destiny.

Even leading elementalists aren't sure if all sightings are the result of a single spirit, or if many Apple Pie Elementals roam the American countryside.  (There are, however, rumors of a paranormal military unit that employed several of them in an elite Ranger battalion during World War II.)

For 5E:
Large elemental, unknown alignment
10d10+50 (110) HP
STR 20(+5)  DEX 8(-1)  CON 20(+5)  INT 10  WIS 10  CHA 15(+2)
Speed 30ft
Languages - everything spoken in America, y'all!

Damage vulnerability - poison
Condition immunities - exhausted, paralyzed, unconscious
Passive perception 10
CR 5 (1800xp)

Multiattack:  The Apple Pie Elemental can make three slam attacks.
Slam:  Melee Attack: +8, reach 10ft, one target.  Hit: 14 (2d8+5) pastry damage.

(That image is from the Regular Show Wiki, by the way; I've gotta watch that show at some point...!)


  1. Cool concept and nice stats...

    1. Very glad you liked it...thanks for stopping by and commenting!

  2. Bravo sir! This gave me a good chuckle.